What to do, what to do

 Sunday at church I had seen a gentleman I did not recognize but didn't get a chance to speak with him. On Thursday Steve came to Bible study. His wife and he recently moved to FL after retirement and now live next door to their daughter and her family, also members of our church. How nice is that?! Steve’s wife is visiting another daughter in MN while he gets things straightened away at the new house. We had a chance to chat before class and afterward, with me asking what he is doing to keep busy in these few weeks into retirement. He described it as still trying to find his way, said others have told him they are so active they wondered how they had time to work. Steve was not there yet! 

He used the analogy of having driven a long time on the freeway at 70 miles an hour and then coming to a sudden stop. That has to be jarring to the system. At least they had the task of packing up and moving from Holland, MI to FL and getting settled in. We at the table offered our suggestions including his being so handy and helpful with their granddaughter right next door, a Downs Syndrome child. He agreed about this. We also told how our vacancy pastor who is our former pastor spent his retirement taking care of the church property, doing whatever he could to maintain things in good order. Surely he will go back to doing that once the new pastor is installed. Plus he traveled to see his family in the upper Midwest periodically. I told Steve that he at least now has something special to do on Thursday mornings, joining us for Bible study. Hey, it’s a start!

The Ten Commandments for Seniors

 

Have you done enough?

Have you done enough? Have you seen enough? Enough what, and compared to whom? A recent list popped up on Facebook listing national monuments and landmarks in our nation where the readers were to indicate whether or not they have visited this place. Those which showed up on my page counted as many as 14 or as few as only five. Note, I used the word 'only' which could be construed as a criticism. I do not scoff at the few numbers of sites visited or seen, but feel badly for the person with such limited experiences. 

Some of the sites are the major landmarks like the Statue of Liberty, the Grand Canyon, Gateway Arch, the Washington Monument, those types of sites. Others are more like theme parks, recreation areas, natural landmarks like famous or grand rivers in the USA. It is entertaining to go through and click on the ones I have seen or visited, and a few caused me to look them up online to see what and where they are! A couple of the sites listed are here in my own state, the nation's oldest city, Disney World, and the Everglades State Park. Check, check, and check!

The list does not cause me to feel as though I missed anything, but, rather does allow me to appreciate the places I have been and things I have seen in my now 69 years. Actually I learned how to ski (chalk it up!) at Lake Tahoe and twice rode snowmobiles there. My former spouse and I drove up Pikes' Peak when on vacation in Colorado one year. Talk about nerve wracking! My son, Justin, and I have been to the top of the Empire State Building, perhaps not my first time, but I cannot remember if I had gone up there before our visit. With my sisters, Lynn and Lori, a trip to the Mall of America was enjoyed, which I considered too much a good thing. We ended up going to see a movie while the rest of our group shopped! One of the more significant sites was Arlington National Cemetery with my former spouse, son, and in-laws, Harv and Barb. 

Our nation provides many wonderful sites and places to visit and it is sad that some people never leave their home state or area, or have no desire to do so. Often times my wish was to go hang out at the beach, since moving to FL, that is, but my spouse did enjoy driving and exploring. In my closet are many reels of slides which hold the photos of our trips out west, most of which took place before we had children. For some people, looking at other people's pictures and hearing about their trips is sufficient to satisfy their wanderlust. For others, hour and hours in the car, sometimes without air conditioning, out west, is the way to go. That experience simply adds to the memory. 

Just so you know, I got to check off 22 places of the thirty-four listed, thanks be to God!

To be a friend...

 The highest honor of friendship isn't being invited to "that party" or out on a girls weekend.

It's not clinking champagne glasses at fancy brunches or wearing matching shirts on a beach in Florida. 

That all is nice and fun and good and special, but it's not what it's about, not at all.  

The real honor of friendship is being invited into someone's REAL.

It's getting an invitation into the nitty gritty, the not-so-pretty, the hard stuff, the vulnerable stuff, the weird stuff, the unpolished stuff.

It's being welcomed into a home where the sink is full of dishes and the laundry is covering the couch.

It's entering the places of heart ache and pain.

It's being invited to the hospital room when your friend is still in her mesh underwear from birth.

It's sitting crosslegged in old sweats on the floor and laughing till you cry.

It's carrying around secrets that you've been trusted to keep.

It's listening and hearing.

It's holding space for each other.

It's answering phone calls just to talk something through.

 

The highest honor of friendship isn't found in beautifully planned events or brightly filtered photos. 

The highest honor of friendship is messy and dingy and real.

It's in unfiltered photos of laughing so hard your double chin is showing.

It's loving each other's babies and holding each other while you ugly cry. 

I can't stress this enough:

If you've been invited into even one person's real, you are blessed.

Cherish it.

An end of year to-do list:

 

This is being a friend!

The highest honor of friendship isn't being invited to "that party" or out on a girls weekend.

It's not clinking champagne glasses at fancy brunches or wearing matching shirts on a beach in Florida.

That all is nice and fun and good and special, but it's not what it's about, not at all.

The real honor of friendship is being invited into someone's REAL.

It's getting an invitation into the nitty gritty, the not-so-pretty, the hard stuff, the vulnerable stuff, the weird stuff, the unpolished stuff.

It's being welcomed into a home where the sink is full of dishes and the laundry is covering the couch.

It's entering the places of heart ache and pain.

It's being invited to the hospital room when your friend is still in her mesh underwear from birth.

It's sitting cross-legged in old sweats on the floor and laughing till you cry.

It's carrying around secrets that you've been trusted to keep.

It's listening and hearing.

It's holding space for each other.

It's answering phone calls just to talk something through.

The highest honor of friendship isn't found in beautifully planned events or brightly filtered photos.

The highest honor of friendship is messy and dingy and real.

It's in unfiltered photos of laughing so hard your double chin is showing.

It's loving each other's babies and holding each other while you ugly cry.

I can't stress this enough:

If you've been invited into even one person's real, you are blessed.

Cherish it.

Author: @wonderoakbyjessjohnston

A new adventure!

The other day I was reading on Facebook (I am not afraid of it like some are!) and came upon an announcement for a restart of a writing group in Clay County. I replied to the post via email and informed them I would be there. Today was our first gathering! 

We met at the Orange Park Library in the meeting room, a nice group plus the moderator, Lou. We went around the room to introduce ourselves and explain what is our genre. Several of the younger people were science fiction writers or thrillers. Others were mystery. I was alone with the biography/memoir theme, but one man who leads a similar group to this one was a ghost writer for other people's biographies. How cool is that?!

We talked for almost two hours to establish our format, much of which Lou had already determined since he had been part of other writing groups in the past. We will meet monthly and Lou will arrange for speakers to address the group: editors, self-publishers, other services needed for writing a book. This is going to be exciting. I like meeting new people and look forward to spending time with these folks at least once a month, more if we hit it off as friends!

Years ago, I was part of a writer's group where each time we met we shared something we'd written and the others would critique it. We met in an area coffee shop, which is now a Moe's BBQ. Sometimes it was distracting because people would come in and out, not realizing what we were doing. On occasion I knew people and I had to quickly explain that we were having a meeting. This group was such a blessing for me, the answer to a prayer. It gave me a different thing to think about besides what was happening to my life. The man who led it was a magazine editor for his living and ran this group as a hobby. It was so enjoyable. When Richard moved away, we ceased meeting but it was great while it lasted. 

My friend, Christine, took interest in the group and attended a few times. She was a journal writer, another genre, usually not for publication, but was a writer nonetheless. We two ladies would attend a couple of Writer's Conferences which we held at The Beaches but have also faded away. Those were really good times! Loved staying at the hotel and mingling with others who loved to write, and some who even made money doing so.

Let's hope this group continues to grow and becomes like a family to our attendees. At least to me!