Still, Jesus Triumphs Over Tragedy

Here it is--Timmy's birth date. He'd be 12 years old now, which almost makes me sound younger than I am. That was the plan, after all....not really, but a lady at church told me when I had Timmy that having a daughter late in life kept her young. Now, we'll never know if that would have happened in my case! This cold weather ( a relative thing, I realize) is making me feel old today---I need some sunshine, please!!!!!

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The house is beginning to smell wonderful as my roasts are doing just that in the slow cooker, bathing in golden mushroom soup and "a little wine", as Justin Wilson used to say. Sauerkraut is in the oven, slowly cooking the flavor of the pork through it. Some would say that sauerkraut cooking is not a pleasant aroma, but I disagree. It sort of reminds me of when I worked at Shady Lane Home, in Manty. Those were the days.....

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Oh, wait, I have to watch this big news story on TV---okay, I see.....I am supposed to program my fitness regimen according to my astrological sign. Oh, please! First of all, there is no fitness regimen to speak of and secondly, Satan has so many cunning ways of infiltrating our daily living with what appears to be an innocuous method. Watch out everybody! Must be a slow news day, or something to counteract the caucuses in two states today.

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Shortly I'll be heading off to Cindy's for a card making class. For lunch, Martie, Justin, and I will be eating at Timmy's favorite restaurant, Sweet Tomatoes, as we've done traditionally on his birthday ever since he died. The first year after he died was the day we put in the pond in the backyard of The Preserve house, with the help of some of the Rosewood staff and Joel, a member over at Victory. He was our Boss, as his brother and he had done this type of thing before.

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At the end of the day, as tired as everyone was, we did our ceremonial birthday balloon launch down by the big pond on the edge of the property. Got cleaned up and then off the four of us went to Sweet Tomatoes. No, wait, I think it was only three of us, as Mom couldn't get herself to go. She might remember that better than I am. I was still married at that time, which makes for the three......

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The practice of having the balloon launch sort of started when St. Johns held a memorial service for Timmy with the pre-k and kindergarteners a week or so after his death. The chaplain had a brief service, many parents of the kids were there, and we had filled our car with helium balloons, courtesy of one of our neighbors in Waterford Landing, who was in the balloon business. The Eagle Harbor club staff blew them up with their machine for us. So nice of them! The parents and children dedicated a tree and a concrete bench with Timmy's name on it, and then the kids were given a balloon to launch to celebrate his birthday.

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We went back inside and served cupcakes and juice, Blue's Clues as the theme, as Timmy's missed birthday treat. He'd wanted a pajama party for his birthday party so I had gone out to buy some pj's so that I could attend. Usually I wear nighties so was going to be excluded. I kept those unused pajamas as a rememberance of Timmy's missed birthday party. It's funny the things that bring back memories, something which would have been insignificant if he was alive today...............

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How blessed he is to be celebrating not his earthly life, but rather eternal life, bliss, with the Heavenly Father! The tears are for ourselves, not for him. God bless, everyone!

Jesus Triumphs Over Tragedy

This day started early and am glad that I set the alarm on my cell phone to wake me. At 8:30 a.m. I had to be at an appointment and had a chance to "talk shop" with Diane, my financial manager. We talked about our business stuff first and then shifted gears to talk a bit of politics, mostly local in nature, and then of course, our faith conversations. She's had some tragedies in her life, too, so we are good for each other in many ways.

Today, though, I took her a little present--a service folder from Timmy's funeral. (For the benefit of new readers: Timmy drowned on January 14, 2001 in our backyard pool.) We talked about the outpouring of love that was experienced that week and forward. I also told her about having the funeral service on video so that I can watch and listen to the service, hear the wonderful message from Pastor Prange, see faces again of those who have now gone ahead of us to heaven, and just have a good, hard cry so I can enjoy a pounding headache. A little like biting on a sore tooth.....

Well, off I go to spend some time with Christine. We are finally getting together and doing our thing, and hopefully have a regular date on selected Fridays enjoying some culture and a "little lunch"!

Have a good day, all!

It's a grumpy looking day out there this morning

Almost didn't want to get out of bed because it didn't seem as though it was morning! I count on the sun shining in on me to remind me to get up.

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Rather than just throw the covers off and leap out of bed, I watched a couple episodes of "Frasier" from Season 4. Justin gave me the first four seasons of what is considered by some the "smartest program on TV", probably was in its day. Between that program and "Seinfeld", I spend way too much time laughing out loud in my house. I wonder if anyone can hear me in the neighboring units........must sound like there's always a party going on over here!
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Saturday I'd popped in at Great Hang Ups, my favorite hang out, and somehow Julia and I started discussing glass art and the making thereof. Oh, I remember now........Rick had told me about staying at The Venetian in Las Vegas when he was at a conference, and I curled my lip about it. I'd love to go there and see the pretty glass, but mostly to see/hear The Phantom of the Opera show that plays there. Jen mentioned the lovely ornaments that he brought back for her, and that's how Julia and I got talking about glass. (I always take the long way around.........) She pulled up a website for Dale Chihuly, a glass artist from WA and showed me some of his more famous work. All of a sudden I caught a glimpse of these fantastic bowls, and realized that this type of bowl, an art piece, Frasier has sitting next to his fireplace!! I love that bowl, it always catches my eye. I researched it on-line when I got home and sure 'nuff, on a trivia page about the program, it mentions the Chihuly bowl, made by "a local artist"! How fun!**************************************
On Seinfeld I am obsessed about the hook by the door, and on Frasier, the art pieces. In fact, Justin has the same style of Grecian helmet on his shelf that Frasier has on his! See, it IS smart!
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It used to be extremely difficult for me to sit and watch a program on TV, usually feeling the need to take care of something or someone, too restless to roost. I've really gotten quite good at it, and in fact, when it used to be unsettling for me to go to the theater, it's gotten to be quite comfortable for me to sit through a movie. Except for the fact that I like to talk during the movie (just like on Seinfeld!), and am usually freezing half to pieces. It used to feel as though time was a wastin', that there some work I needed to be doing instead of sitting around. Glad that I've gotten over that--lots of changes in my life in the last several years....used to feel that way about taking vacation, too, unless it was for a convention or seminar. No longer.....

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Presently I am in decision-making mode, trying to figure out what to do this summer for traveling. Besides the trip North in April, I am considering going with Julia to Gatlinburg for a class and staying in a house near there that the Hilchey's have access to. That would be in late March.

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Justin's trip with his art history group is in mid-March and since that's an expense I wasn't expecting, it sort of voids the trip we'd planned together for May. It isn't really prudent for me to pay for two, or rather, three trips to the Mediterranean. The school trip, as far as I'm concerned, is a "must do" as he's going to garner so much more from that education-intensive, professor-led tour than he would floating from city to city and merely scanning the sites.

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I do so enjoy traveling with Justin, as we aren't compelled to dash from site to site, but can "meander" at our own pace and soak it all up. When we go to the Greek Islands, I enjoy going bistro to bistro and just......ahhhhhh! Plus go see our friend, Jeannie, at her shop in Santorini, which is right across the path from, guess what?--another bistro!

This is a view of a patio just below Jeannie's bistro in Santorini

I have the option of going with the Humanns again in November, touching many of the same sights Justin and I had planned for May. This is an option, but am a bit concerned that I won't be warm enough...I've got this thing about being warm, you know?

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I am dressed and ready for the day pretty much, still have some fluffing to do before going to lunch at The Club. No jeans today, but instead have my nice velour pants on to help keep me warm. It looks like winter and most likely will feel like it too. Tonight is an Outreach Team meeting at church and we'll be finalizing some details concerning our sponsorship program and the plans for the Friendship Sunday in February.

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Just had a marvelous, long-needed phone conversation with Rosalie, my friend in Houston. She used to be the secretary at Good Shepherd and is dear to my family. She had gotten to spend some time with the boys in November of 2000 as she passed through on her way back to Houston from Melbourne. We had someone babysitting Justin and Timmy as we were on a cruise at the time of her visit, and didn't even know she was coming! Timmy was a bit upset about what he thought was a 'disruption in service' between the appointed babysitter and Rosalie. He didn't transition well, so I can't say that Rosalie and he had much warm fuzzy time during which turned out to be her last time to see him alive.

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She came back for his funeral, and spent good time with Mom and Justin, keeping them company and such during this rough time. She's a great friend to have, and even though we're miles apart now, we are still quite connected. Her family donated a lovely message-bearing picture in his memory, which hangs in Precious Lambs classroom now. The child in the painting looks so much like Timmy that it's scary. Dee offered to add some dimples to the cheeks of the child but I refused, thinking that would be just too much, too close a resemblance. But thanks anyway, Dee......

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Time to head over to The Club to have lunch with the ladies. I am so looking forward to having a nice visit with them, get to know Karen better and have some laughs together. Bon Appétit!

I'm in my happy place right now.......

Sarah is singing to me from my computer as I sit here, listening to the wind blow and watch the waves crash against the breakwater. She is singing "In Trutina" from Carmena Burana, and Sarah's voice is "like butta", as they used to say on SNL about Barbra Streisand.

I heard on the radio that we can expect to get about an inch of rain, which I predicted would happen after having my windows washed yesterday!

This afternoon I got my pretty Moroccan lamps and colored glass chimes hung up in my bedroom window, nice and clean again. Perfecto!

Justin sort of blew me out of the water today when he did some research about a piazza in Florence that's special to Twila, Jean, and me. In 2005, as we sat on the steps waiting for the rest of our companions, Twila tossed a cracker out to a pigeon who wanted a snack, and a thousand birds came diving in for the kill, nearly taking out the visitors to the Basilica Santa Croce, where we were sitting. We continue to laugh about that experience to this day, and every pigeon that came near Justin and me (2006) he'd ask, "Do you know Twila?"

Justin and I didn't go in for the tour for some reason, and he found out today all the famous people whose graves are inside this basilica. Among the names he mentioned were Michaelangelo, Marconi, Galileo, Machiavelli, Gentile and Rossini, thus it is known also as the Pantheon of the Italian Glories. He claims we missed it because we were busy looking for the Murano glass shop to buy my chandlelier. That might be, but I also think that the tour folks should have played it up more so we'd known what was in there. I think we took the walking tour that year, so had less time available for pigeon feeding.....oh, well, guess we'll have to go back. In fact, he is planning to go with his art history class over Spring Break, but that leaves me here to weep! Firenze!!! Anyway, we are kicking ourselves for not going inside this lovely building, simply admired it from the outside, across the piazza where we had our VERY expensive diet Cokes and shared a berries and gelato dessert. The edge of the Basilica can be seen on the left edge of the photo. In front of Justin is one of the $9 Coke Lites we enjoyed.....

This a.m. I met up with Jen and had a nice breakfast in an out-of-way place in Middleburg and then she went with me to the salon for my pedicure. Christine popped in for a moment and we got to chat briefly as she was on her way to an appointment. She looked lovely as always. Before running off, though, she invited me to join her for a musicale event on Friday which I would simply LOVE to attend. It's in the afternoon and she'll have to work around her schedule first. I'm excited and really can go by myself if I want to. Have nothing else planned for that day anyway.

Tonight while at Bible Bites and choir, I got great news that the Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra will be performing as scheduled (the conductor left me a message on my machine at home!!!). The "bad" news is that the concert coming up is the same day as Timmy's birthday/funeral anniv. so I've offered my tickets to someone else. I am glad they've reached an agreement and are getting back to work, as I was getting concerned that we might not get to see/hear "La Traviotta" in February. Justin, Robbie and I are going to that together----can't wait!

There are a few more things needing to be taken care of before Janet, Karen, and Judy come tomorrow.....I can either take care of it tonight or get up earlier in the morning. I am sort of worn out emotionally tonight after experiencing something weird and upsetting from my past late this afternoon, so perhaps sleeping would be the best healer at this time.

"Oh, for a thousand tongues to sing my great Redeemer's praise; the glories of my God and King, the triumphs of His grace!"

This is the kind of thinking that helps me sleep at night, and I hope you have some thing just as calming, soothing as this for yourselves...'night all!

What an awesome class tonight!

This evening was yet another interesting Bible study , our "People Close to God" series, which serves either as introduction to what we believe and why, as well as a wonderful refresher for those already schooled in the faith. There were some new faces tonight which makes it all the more interesting, as they will ask the difficult or probing question which sometimes makes the rest of us really put on our "thinking caps", especially the stuff we take for granted. Love it!

My hands are still cold, sort of can't wait to go to bed so they can get warmed up. Tomorrow is a big day for me as I am finally getting my long-needed pedicure out in Middleburg. Lisa, future daughter-in-law of my dear friends, the Woodruff's and fledgling entrepenier, has the blessed opportunity to groom my feet. Jen is meeting me for breakfast at Nana's first and then off I go.

Tonight one of the ladies at church mentioned how much she enjoyed the blog, and complimented me on the "way I turn my words". Thanks, LeeAnn, for saying that. This "gift" really didn't appear until immediately after Timmy died as I got busy trying to put my thoughts to print, for his funeral service folder. The first epic I wrote was too long so Pastor Prange asked me to shorten it, which I somehow managed to do. Rick and the office staff worked together to print the original with a lovely background paper. They presented it to us in a frame with a photo of Timmy, just prior to our heading out for the visitation on the 18th. It was quite moving how the Rosewood family thought enough to do that for us, for me, since it was my first real attempt to express in writing what made up Timmy Day. And so it began.....

Next time I'll have more to say regarding the blessings which have flowed since Timmy went to heaven, but for tonight, I want to just reflect a bit about his death and the events that unfolded. Don't worry, I won't spoil the book by writing it all on this blog. Have to keep the audience wanting more, as my leader at the Writer's Crew taught!

Peace be to you all!

Baby, it's cold outside!

I feel sorry for the poor window washer, Matt, as he dangles from my balcony trying to get at my sliding glass doors. Maybe he is not cold as he's working so hard, but having the doors opened makes for a bit of a chill for this hot house flower that is Kim!

Oh, it looks so nice and sparkling now that he's done with the windows! Now, watch, it'll rain and get them all spotty again. Having them done professionally is the absolute ONLY way to go, as there is no way Justin nor I would attempt to climb around on this 3rd floor and wash the big doors from the outside. I did tell Matt that if he fell, he should holler for me because I couldn't stand to watch him work out there! Thanks for your help, Lady! At my suggestion, he used my broom handle to extend his washing tools which was better than having him stand on the railing.......

My sister-in-law, Nancy, showed me how to find misspellings by using the "dashboard" so now I may have a reduced number of errors in my postings. The problem seems to be that I write like I speak, a mile a minute with gusts up to 250 so that opens the doors for mistakes. At least in print, you can take it back.....not so easily with the spoken word. Nancy does website work for her living so knows her way around the World Wide Web.

It's been a busy "Day" in this household so far today---besides the window washer (Perfect Vision for those in Orange Park that need this service), telephone calls, special friends coming over to share some time and counsel, and then communications on the computer. And now it's already time for Rush to start. My little space heater is cookin' away, trying to warm my feet and legs after having the doors open, chilling the air. Using the area heater is far superior to heating the entire house, just the room that I'm in needs to be steamy hot......

While Matt was washing the windows, I washed a bunch of my colored glass items, as they still have residual remodeling dust on them from when my bathroom/bedroom were redone. Now they will sparkle like my freshly cleaned windows! Justin can hang them back up when he comes over the next time. or I can climb up to put them in place myself....we'll see how patient I am or how ambitious. Matt said he'd not seen so much pretty glass in the windows before, except at church! Cute!

No wonder I'm chilly---it's only 54 degrees above zero out there! It would be a safe bet that it's warmer here than it will be on Sunday night for the Packer game. I am going to display my new Packer flag which the Hilchey's gave me, probably hang it on the outside porch railing in the courtyard. I will do that again for the Super Bowl Party even if the Packers don't make it to the Super Bowl (God forbid!) But, a party is a party no matter who's playing.

Oh, last night I had a wonderful time with Cindy R., who asked me to attend a Southern Living party with her in St. Johns County Golf and Country Club. Carol, a cropping friend, was Hostess for the party. When Judy J. heard I was going there she said, "That's like taking an alcoholic to a bar!". Oh yeah, she was correct.....I bought some lovely ceramic pieces that match some I purchased at a Southern Living party last year, plus some colored glass lanterns to hang in my studio by the doors. Even booked a party from her so I can earn some more plus, yes, have yet another little party at my house! The demonstrator also offers her decorating expertise if asked, and to that I ask, "Why not?". My movie outing fell apart as Judy found out she was getting company and Martie was too pooped after her class, so Cindy's call came at just the right time. And what a blast it was!

Lori, I had such a goofy dream this a.m. just before I was due to awaken. As dreams go, I ran into my dentist outside his office (in "real" life my dentist is female) and told him about my emergency root canal I'd just had done. The dental assistant escorted us into the office, put me in the chair while you looked on, and I felt her tape something to my cheek. Thinking she was going to take an x-ray for their own use, I was compliant. All of a sudden I was totally woozy and sort of curled up on the chair, with my head on the foot, whimpering that I didn't feel well and whoops!--I threw up on the assistant! She was not pleased with that, and put an emesis dish tightly against my chin in case it happened again. The dentist came in to see what was going on and he asked why they had tried to put me under, that I was just getting an x-ray taken. We couldn't get out of there fast enough. Now, what does that all mean? Don't eat hull-less popcorn before going to the dentist!!!

One of my duties for the church is serving as Secretary of the Ladies' Group and have some minutes to type up for that, plus some other Outreach materials waiting to be worked on, so, for now, a fond adieu.

So far, so good today

Well, the big day is here---Timmy's anniversary. I've received several cards, e-cards, phone calls plus personal greetings so far today and enjoyed a lovely lunch with the Monday Bible study group. In the arms of my church family, a great place to be today and always!

Had a nice, long chat with Linda last night which was good for my soul, she is so good for my soul and my heart! We can laugh about the dumbest things. She has plans to go on a cruise in late March but that won't work with my trip to MN at the begining of April. Everything has to happen at once sometimes. I'll try to get some time later in the month to do some scrapbooking with her when I'm in Manty.

When I stopped by the cemetery today after lunch, I saw the guys closing up a grave over in the "babyland" section, which always saddens me, but moreso today. Someone else is going to feel sorrow like mine for the rest of their lives, but the good news is that the sorrow softens a bit as time goes on. We got told that often early on when Timmy died and I personally have found that to be true. What is also true is that memories fade a bit, something which no one could have ever convinced me would happen. What a learning and growing experience this has all been, going to the School of Hard Knocks, sort of. Okay, then, does that mean I've graduated or is there more "homework" required before I can be considered "honed by the fire"? Wait, wait, wait, don't answer that! I learned a valuable lesson back in 2003---don't ask questions you don't want the answer to!!!! So, no one needs to feel they should answer that question, okay?

I am also getting quite excited about the pending visit from the Prange family, coming into town next week. As Timmy would say, "I so 'cited!" Their schedule is already packed but they've invited me to share in much of it with them. Maybe I can work ahead on the newsletter and such but can't do much about the meetings and other committments that happen in the evenings. It will be cool to see what a little man Lucas has become and meet Grace for the first time. Last year she was still in utero for Brent's wedding and we didn't go up north for CHRISTmas this year, so missed meeting Baby Grace in person. I have a new nephew born last fall that I haven't met in person yet, either. I'd better get on the ball!

That Joanne! She is tooo much! She just called me from Jax Beach to tell me about this fantastic store that screamed "Kim Lahaie Day!!!" when she walked into it. She saw the most lovely dishware, some which looked like the Amalfi Coast or Greek Islands that would be perfect for me. Oh, she was so excited about her find! Jo picked up a stack of brochures to bring back for me but I'll have to wait to get them, as she's heading to Orlando for a Buffini meeting for a couple days...nuts! Nothing to stop me from taking a ride to Jax Beach myself for a first-hand look, right? Don't answer that, and besides, I am off of dish restriction for two years already. Maybe Justin would like to go with me, or would he get me into even more trouble??!!??

The sky is a lovely blue today, not so overcast as it was yesterday. We got buckets of rain during Bible study but it had cleared up by the time church got out. My car needed a washing anyway! Owen has offered to wash my car and put a nice finish coat on it for me. What a sweetheart he is.....and I knew that before he offered to wash my car! Olivia drives my big red car now and I love being able to get a ride in it every so often. Anyway, there is a white bird bobbing about on the river, certainly Joanne knows its name but I just recognize it as a white floating bird. I wonder if water fowl ever get sea sickness.........

Later today I might be going to the movies to see The Bucket List with some church ladies and perhaps my heart, Martie. We have to see how she feels after her art class gets out. On Wednesday, the 30th, I am going to the opera, Tosca, but no one else from church wants to go. I've approached Christine to see if she'd like to go, I don't spend nearly enough time with her, since she works not far from her home, not venturing into Jacksonville as much as she used to. She really needs to get out more!!!!!

This Thursday I am having lunch with Janet and her MI friend, Karen, at The Club and then coming over here to enjoy the view and spend some time together. They are going to help keep me busy so that I don't "dwell" too much, and there is no one like Janet who can keep me busy! She is a such a joy, a treasure in my life!

You have all probably gotten the e-mail thingy that circulates every so often about how people come into our lives for a Reason, A Season, or A Lifetime. I never want to let go of people, which sometimes adds to my heartache because I CAN'T or WON'T let go, but simply have to believe that people come into my life, personally, at exactly the right time, either for me, or for them! I love the power of the Lord, His mighty, guiding hands!

Speaking of hands, mine are getting cold, so will close this chapter for now. I don't know what to tell you about the "comments" problem, not sure just what has to be done to leave a comment. Linda's came through just fine last night. I'll have to ask her to walk me through it so those of you who have tried can give it a shot. Thanks for trying, though!

...serve the Lord with gladness!