A smile on my heart!

Angelo with his brothers and Mama were outside today, enjoying a lovely day, at long last. The two older boys and Lisa were reading together and Angelo just looked around and amused himself. I hope the weather is decent when I am up there!

Living a life of compromise

Once in a while I wax profound and yesterday was one of those days! Earlier in the day I was in the kitchen, yes, you read that correctly, making my escalloped potatoes with ham. Tracy, who lives downstairs, was calling from the road, asking if I was ‘a lady who lunches’ or not today. Since I was pretty quick at getting my dinner made, I was in! She mentioned that MamMa and she were going lift chair shopping.

I asked how the getting settled part was coming along, since MamMa moved in downstairs. A couple weeks ago there was a struggle in more than one way getting Willie Mae and her stuff into one room. It seems to have settled down some but now were adding another piece of furniture to her already tight quarters. MamMa is greatly attached to some of her furniture but it is not really safe to have her room more tightly packed than Rooms to Go! Tracy has a hard time being firm with MamMa but as an outsider, it is easy for me to say that something has to go. I told Tracy, who is a licensed therapist, it is all about ‘living a life of compromise’…Tracy said she really liked that and was going to write it down for future use. I am flattered!

And it is true! All the time we make a compromise, not necessarily the ones thrust upon us but some we make just to get along in life. Are we really so attached to an idea or something tangible that we become unyielding? I do not get upset when the palm trees are trimmed on our property, yet others are out taking pictures of the “butchered landscape”. Excuse me, really? Would you prefer to have dead branches and hardened fruit crashing through the glass than have them trimmed? Before summer is out, or hurricane season is over, the growth will have returned to its pre-trimming splendor. We compromise, or sacrifice, the branches on the trees for our safety and well-being.

If we are uncompromising and insist on having 11 pieces of furniture in a 16 x 16 room, and we are 90 years old with a walker, something has got to give! At some point one must surrender or compromise. Especially when it comes to downsizing, as I have done plenty of that in the past eight years. Wow, has it been eight years already? No, actually it has been a bit longer than that but for publishing purposes, yes, downsizing I did! Some of the things I really really liked, I kept. Other things were easier to let go of for spaces’ sake or for my own sanity. And for purposes of decorating in my own style. Mission accomplished, I’d say!

The ladies came last night for Dinner and a Movie, watching “The King’s Speech”, with Martie and Betty seeing it for the first time. When the King is forced to make his first wartime radio address, his coach was right there with him, helping him along. In the background played a song by Beethoven which I know better as one sung by Sarah Brightman. A haunting melody which truly enhanced the drama of the speech as well as the King’s ability to deliver it. Oh, rats! I gave away the ending!

My escalloped potatoes and ham were well-received, with Martie and Twila going back for seconds. Twila reported that the creamed corn is her favorite which I was glad to hear since I only had green beans besides the corn. She is on a blood thinner right now and has to avoid green veggies which is why I chose the corn. No leftover corn but at least another meal or two of the potatoes. Tonight my friends, Cliff and Carol, are coming over so I might make a frozen pizza or perhaps, if I feel getting dressed, may get a Papa Murphy’s. Since I am happily in my swimsuit now (yeah, no more dust bunnies!!) I will stay in this until I decide to put on clothes for when the my guests arrive. But now, off I go!

After a great day....

....a lovely morning! The sun is beginning to shine but the line which marks out Mandarin is blurred by fog. My thought is the sunshine will burn off the fog quickly and we will see 88 degrees before the day is out. I will spend part of my day making escalloped potatoes with ham for my Dinner and a Movie gathering this evening. Guess I had better get that fire extinguisher from outside and bring it in the house while I cook.

Last night at dinner I shared my doctor visit stories with Linda H. and Judy J. and we had good laughs over it. Judy especially questioned the reason for asking me about a fire extinguisher, that simply baffled her. I had heard a radio host report a couple years ago that we will come to a point where we will not recognize our country anymore, or the world, for that matter, and I think it's happening. That which would have been ridiculous a few years ago has come to pass, including questions about loaded weapons and fire extinguishers!

Besides the laughs we also enjoyed good conversation and delicious food at Cracker Barrel. Linda's mom, Iva, is in a rehab facility, recovering after a couple of falls. She is not making much headway in getting her strength back because she has suffered additional falls when Linda has her over to her house. As much as Linda likes getting Iva out, it often ends in disaster. Iva, on the other hand, is as stubborn as ever, and prefers not to eat in the dining room with all those old people. And the physical therapy???? "What good is it for me to put colored pegs into the holes? That's so stupid!" But, Iva has a boyfriend in the Home, a young orderly/NA....so she does have a bright spot in her stay there. I have seen this all before when I worked in the old folk's home, and Judy's daughter is the administrator of a nursing home in MI, so shares stories as well.

Speaking of nursing homes, as Judy was driving us home, my bro-in-law, Harvey, called to ask me if anyone had called me about Sharon. It seems his sister has been in the hospital on and off and now presently since Friday, at this time in ICU in Green Bay. Sharon is the cancer survivor, having had a brain tumor at the age of 16 and given six months to live. She underwent conventional treatment and then experimental treatment, some controversial ones. Though she lost her sight, she got back her 'reason' for most of her life, but over time, the scar tissue and her background prevented her from maturing beyond age 16, or even regressing some to a younger age. But acts like an old lady, again via her background.

So, anyway, she lives in an adult group home and they noticed that Sharon was sleeping more and falling more. The doctor checked her out and thought she was okay but the next day, Saturday, the staff took her to the ER. Then she was transferred to Green Bay where they could run more extensive tests and her doctor was on staff. Harvey and John both told me she was unable to speak clearly, as though she had marbles in her mouth, was running a fever, but the doctors could find no infection. She has stomach pain which might be attributed to gall stones but the tests showed no infection. Also some liver involvement which is often connected to gall bladder problems. The medical folks are baffled but I guess she is where she needs to be in this situation. John has been to see her a couple times, and since Harv lives in Green Bay, he can stop by after work to check in. I guess Nancy went to see her one day since Sharon was admitted. I am so glad that Harvey called and let me know.

When I got home, I called Marian to let her know about her younger sister, Sharon. It turns out that Marian had only recently been released from the hospital herself, having congestive heart failure. By her voice, I could tell Marian was agitated and she informed me that she had her medications changed again, adding steroids and lasix to help get the fluid out of her heart chamber. But she is also suffering with a skin rash from head to toe, no apparent cause. Biff even tried washing her clothes at his facility to see if it was soap or something like that. No one can figure out what the cause it but the rash was making her wacky. They gave her an Atavan, and the nurse applied a hydrocortisone ointment which helped to settle her down a bit. I asked her if she didn't already take Atavan, as I knew she did before, and Marian said the doctor took her off the medications for controlling her mania and depression. Yikes! I could tell in her voice and cadence that she was off of them. On top of all that, she has basal cell carcinoma on her face which will be surgically removed next week. Her strength is sapped so she now needs someone to push her wheel chair around instead of propelling it herself. Other than that, she's fine!

So, I called Harvey back to tell him about Marian's condition and told him that she was sad that she has not heard from anyone up north in a long while. I had sent her mailing address and phone numbers to everyone so they could keep in touch. He assured me that it's not that they don't care but rather they are not good at communicating. That is true, and I am honored that he has called me twice in the past few months. I let him know I greatly appreciated being informed and warned him that I am coming up next week so we can get together somehow. It sure will be nice when he is retired and not have to work those goofy hours like he does now. Often I will tease him that he might as well have been a farmer with that early to bed/early to rise bread route of his!

Today I will get busy and write, or type, a note to Marian since I don't have time this weekend to drive down there. Tonight is the aforementioned Dinner and a Movie, and tomorrow evening my friends, the Douglas's, are coming over just in time for the end of the world to arrive. We are going to hold hands and go together, just as it should be! They were at Cracker Barrel last night when we were there, on their date night. Sunday is worship and Bible study and then pool time, Lord willing. There was supposed to be an event at The Club but this a.m. I woke to an e-mail reporting the Island Bash was postponed until August! That frees me up to attend the house concert on the 5th floor then, the last one as the owner is moving out due to divorce. So sad! And the condo is being marketed at just less than half its original value. Ouch!

Is it morning already?

It seems I only just laid down and already I am up, typing away! It is light outside and Fox 'n Friends is underway so it's alright for me to be awake. I cannot recall precisely what was on TV when I went to sleep although I do believe it was The O'Reilly Factor, which is exactly what I woke to this a.m. In my dreams during the night, people were making plans, sort of, for the end of the world to come this weekend. My sister, Lori, bought a bunch of wallpaper which was put on a big sale for the end of the world, 'just in case'. Sunday morning we will know if she can use it or not! One of the participants in Monday Bible study brought along a flyer he got in the mail, which featured a photo of a billboard near Orlando which proclaims the world is May 21. Rats, I spent money on a plane ticket for after that date! Justin heard us talking about this topic at Trivia the other night and he said I should not even worry about it, I won't have to pay for the ticket if the world ends. How true that is!

We were joined at Trivia on Tuesday night by Cary and Nancy, members at Victory with Stephanie. They were going out of town on Wednesday so wanted to eat out the night before to avoid having leftovers and such to deal with. Once again, we all brought something to the table, with even Jesse coming up with a correct answer this week. Sadly, we had competition unlike last week, but we did not win even 3rd place. The group behind ours won first place, the first time we had seen them there. Ringers!!! One of the questions was to name four actors who won Best Actor and Best Supporting Actor in their lives. We only got one right, Denzel Washington, which Nancy contributed. We totally missed stars like Gene Hackmann, Robert DeNiro, and someone else. That's why we do not always win!

Cary and I had the pot roast open face sandwich, served with real mashed potatoes and gravy. Oh, my, it was good! I brought about 1/4 home with me and frankly, it did not reheat very well. The potatoes were okay but the meat seemed rather chewy the second time around. It was the special that night, as often I will try the special since I have no 'regular' choice at Johnny Angels. But there I do often have a scoop of ice cream with hot fudge on it, no whipped cream because I am cutting back....Justin had a chocolate and peanut butter shake, which he had me taste. I am not crazy about that mixture, even though it is like a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. Just not a fan!

The sky is beautiful this a.m., but no sun has broken through yet. A few buildings north of here, yet on the property, is where my friend, Sharon, lives and she regularly captures the morning sky and posts the photos on Facebook. She is a talented lady: professional photographer, RN, musical director at OP Methodist, and is basically a very nice lady. We do not see each other when choir or bells are in rehearsal as both of us are tied up on Wednesday nights! I cannot wait to see her morning posting today, should be lovely!

At choir rehearsal, we had a full house of singers including Carol who answered the impassioned plea of her son. One family who has rejoined the church after years away has a young daughter, about 9 or 10, who wanted to come to choir. I had to let her know it was for confirmed members only but encouraged her to sing with the Sunday school kids. Robbie said last night that he wished he could put together a children's chorus, with 'enthusiastic' singers but we do not have enough kids to do that.

Having Carol there to sing alto with Debbie freed Kristi to sing soprano which works out better since I will be away for one of the anthems. Whew! I hated to leave them in a lurch, but it cannot be helped. For Holy Trinity Sunday we are singing Psalms 150, an oldie but a goodie. Our friend, Gordy, who directed us on this anthem many years ago, had us moving around on the sheet music---men here, women there...the copies are quite marked up, making it hard to know when we are to sing. Robbie has changed it back again, to women singing the women's parts and men, their own, but with all the markings, it gets almost comical. Robbie is a true director, making us learn the anthem, and not simply sing it. Draws us out, and makes us better. Kristi complimented him about that last night, and I told him later, how, when he was talking to us, I thought, "I love that guy!" He loves me too, so we're even! I will miss singing for Ascension Day, at least singing at Good Shepherd. I will get to sing at First German, from the pew!

Today is full day beginning with Bible study at Victory, lunch with my Justin, and perhaps a stop at Payless Shoes at the Town Center Mall since Erica works there. She might not be working when we are there, though, since she is still in high school. Two weekends ago she graduated from FCCJ with her AA in business but has yet to graduate from high school! She is bright and beautiful, choosing to attend Wisconsin Lutheran College this fall. Erica made friends with a young lady who came to Jax from WLC to help with canvassing, etc. this year and is going to be roommates with Erica. Sweet! Her grandparents and auntie live not terribly far away in Janesville so she will not be all alone 'up north'. Erica is a dear young lady and I will certainly miss her...

Yesterday was my grooming day so I went to see my friend, Barb, for my full-moon haircut. She was telling me about her daughter and son-in-law moving up here from South Florida soon. I was so happy for Barb and her husband, having them closer (living with mom and dad at first!) and lending a hand with their grandson, Nicholas. He has a form of autism and her daughter is quite pleased with the program offered at Fleming Island Elementary. Now, they just need to find jobs and get health insurance benefits to be all set. I know Barb is so glad to have them up here, it's been a long time coming. But then Barb dropped a bombshell of having breast cancer!! What?? She had found the lump herself over a month ago before leaving on a cruise and has been running to doctors and specialists in order to determine the course of treatment. It appears to be a contained cancer, similar to what Judy R. had, but the surgery keeps getting put off day by day. She was to have already had it but now it is scheduled for next Friday. A tear sneaked out as she told this news, but then she told me how her daughter cried for 10 minutes when Barb called her with the news. A few more trickled down but I wiped them away quickly, apologizing to Barb for them. When we parted company, I hugged her and wished her the Lord's blessings on the surgery. Her surgeon is the same one who did my last one, just before Timmy died. I know she is in good hands.

This evening I am having dinner with Judy J. and Linda H. with whom I used to dine every week when we still had Bible study during the week. We do not see Linda much as she takes her mom, Iva, to church at Keystone Heights most of the time. Iva is in a rehab center in Starke after experiencing some falls at her home. Linda works in Mandarin so it is on her way home to stop for dinner with us. She was hungry for 'comfort food' so Cracker Barrel it is! Must remember to take a jacket!

Oops! Tuesday got away from me!

Here it is Wednesday already and I missed posting on Tuesday. Was it so full a day? Not really but I did spend less time at this desk than I did between my bed and the loveseat in the family room, keeping my foot elevated. Since I was going to the doctor for my annual checkup, I wanted to not have any ‘red flags’ waving to draw her attention, such as my puffy ankle on my left foot. When I had called in my refills to Wal*Mart over a week ago, the recorded voice told me all three were ready for pick-up. When I got there, however, the technician (love that term for clerk!) informed me only one was ready but phone calls had been placed to the doctor’s office regarding the other two. Okay, I guess….

A couple days went by and I had not heard from either the doctor’s office or the pharmacy so I called the office to check the status. Primarily I was concerned about the blood pressure medication and that was the one called in to the pharmacy. I did not get my prescription for the ‘bad knee’ which allows for my ankle not to swell on the same leg. When I showed it to her yesterday (so much for avoiding red flags), she totally dismissed it, saying she had seen it much worse. When???? Okay, fine, if she has no problem with it, neither do I! It just feels funny to me, sort of inflexible. I attribute this to all the water I am drinking these days, as well as not having my ‘bad knee’ medicine!

When I got to the doctor’s office, things moved along quickly, almost rapid-fire. The young lady working with me, Hannah, was relatively new so it took her a bit longer to do things. When “Betsy” came flying, as she usually does, she began grabbing instruments and checking me, ‘double-teaming’ as she described it. Hannah left then and the doctor went ahead with filling in the blanks on the laptop records. Things I would have thought were already part of my chart, having answered these things several times before.

“Have you had any surgeries?” Well, you can play tic tac toe on my abdomen which I thought was in your records…”Dates?” Oh my goodness, the dates??? “What color were the surgeons’ eyes?” Not really, but it was nearly that bad. “How old was your father when he died?” Um, I know what year it was, but how old, let me do the math….”Do you see the dentist at least twice a year?” Do I need a breath mint or what?? She just wants to make sure I am taking care of myself from head to toe. Betsy told me she appreciated my humor and my patience with the new girl, and with her. “Do you wear wraparound sunglasses?” WHAT??? Granny glasses? Absolutely not! She told me they would help prevent the creases between my eyes and in the corners. I told her my son compliments me on the ‘sunbursts’ around my eyes. He calls them tattoos in reverse, because they are lighter than my face!

The barrage continued with information regarding getting or not getting the flu shot last fall/early winter. No, because I already was sick and could not have the shot. Now I have to wait until next fall to have the shot. Okay, I can do that. Do you have a fire extinguisher? No, but there is one on the building at the top of my stairs. “You have been divorced once?” Yes, once was enough, thanks.

“Do you have loaded firearms in your home…?” Okay, hold it right there!!!! I was surprised by the extinguisher question and the divorce question but when it comes to loaded firearms, I got irritated. I asked, “Okay, who wants to know this?????, indignantly. That is so nobody’s business if I have a fire extinguisher or a loaded weapon, other than my stove! She said it is for her records, and if I answered “Yes” then, she would have to remind me to store the weapon separately from the bullets, out of reach of small children, and so on. That, to me, is so incredibly over-the-top of a well-woman exam. However, I regrouped and kept my humor, informing her of the cannon I have in the river room, aimed at Mandarin. They had better not provoke me or it’s curtains for them! I wonder if I can decline answering these questions, like I decline being weighed! Betsy also informed me it is time for her annual physical, too, but she just hates going to the doctor! Well, we have that in common!

The doctor is highly complementary otherwise, besides the lifestyle questions, and told me that I looked good. She mentioned to Hannah that I always wear nice colors. Betsy again remarked that she wants after my moles (skin tags) but we have to wait until I return in 6 months when the sun season is over. In an hour I was out the door, with my orders for a mammogram in hand and the scrip for the bad knee medication phoned in to Wal*Mart. That way, I won’t have to linger in the store and be tempted to buy stuff while I wait. I do need some AAA batteries (should buy stock in Rayovac!) and might replace my mouse on the laptop. I have to go through all sorts of contortions to activate the mouse these days and it just might be getting tired. The laptop gets more use than does the desktop and that is my original wireless mouse. Wal*Mart has lesser expensive mouses than does Office Max but, unfortunately, I have to go through the DVD section to get to the computer supplies. Should wear blinders! Or wraparound sunglasses!

Reprint from March 24, 2008

This morning at Bible study we were talking about how we should be teaching our children important Bible stories and singing songs to them, and with them, to help them remember Bible truths. I found this 'old' posting and decided to use it once more....

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The day started early, reading e-mails before Dee arrived to repair some glass for me. Several people sent "Comments" to my post from yesterday, sharing their experience with "...Redeemer Lives" and I was moved to tears by them. If you don't usually read the Comments, please do so in order to find out what I am referencing. When I spoke to Martie earlier and she asked how I was, my answer was, "I am in a high emotional state." Oh yeah.........

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Linda shared her story of how she was managing to get through "Redeemer" until she spotted Pastor Hahm wiping away a tear...he said he was fine until he saw Mom and Kevin, the principal, wiping away their tears....."He lives to silence all my fears, He lives to wipe away my tears, He lives my mansion to prepare, He lives to take me safely there..." I hope that's right, I did it by memory. Oh, here is Timmy's service folder, I can check it out--oops, I got it wrong, borrowed from several different verses: "He lives to calm my troubled heart, He lives all blessings to impart". There's not one single "insignificant" verse in that hymn, which made it tough for Mom to pick the ones to use for the funeral. Good job, Mom! As Timmy would say, "You done it!" Kevin also has a little one in heaven so we share special hugs when we meet each other. I look forward to seeing him this Sunday at First German!! And Linda, too!!! And my peoples!!!
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Saturday morning as I was leaving to go to church for communion preparation, I saw a box sitting outside my door. A baby??? Nope, better than that---a lovely circular glass art piece made by the same guy that made my other "manipulated" glass pieces. Dee had dropped it off in the dark of night (or morning) as a surprise for me. She told me last week she had a gift for me that I wouldn't want to accept but she'd make me take it, and that's how she did it! Leave it on the doorstep and run away. The bad news was it had a crack in it, sort of swiveled like a hinge about half way down.
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I called to thank her for the present and then asked if she knew it was cracked. She was sad it was broken and said it had been mended once before, must have re-cracked on the climb up the steps! So, she came this a.m. with her glass glue in hand and we performed surgery on the piece. We glued some glass marbles I had on hand, flat on one side, which we used as "band-aids"on the back side, in the same colors as in the piece. I'll take a photo of it when it's done so you all can see what I'm talking about. "Dr. Roberts" makes house calls, twice climbing my stairs because of beautiful glass!
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After she left I did, too, heading for Bible study, my last one with this group for a month! Judy C. joined us today, as she quit her job last Friday, just up and quit! It was nice to have a new face for the study and for lunch. Our time together at Longhorn was lovely and the farewells tearful. Pastor had suggested putting a picture of me on the table where I usually sit to make it seem like I'm there, but, it would be quiet then!!! I said the quiet part, not him. Tonight are Visitation calls and then that's it for church activity. I will have to drop off some shingle, exterior, and soffit color selections for Cliff, but that gives me a chance to say good-bye to Carol, "auf wiedersehen ", until we meet again!
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Lisa called last night to share some Easter stories with me, putting tears in my ears--again! She told about Lori, Lynn, Alayna, and her singing with the choir, nothing less than the "Hallelujah Chorus" , accompanied by the pipe organ and orchestra. Lisa said she was trembling with excitement about singing it, and was holding Manny in her arms as she sang. He was clinging to her for dear life, probably expecting her to shake him right over the railing! She said he sang, too, throwing out a single "hallelujah" with the choir. Just prior to time for the song, Gabe leaned over and asked Lisa, "Is it time to sing "Jesus" now?" That's what he calls the Chorus. I love it that her little boys know and love that song! They sing that one in heaven, I just know it!!

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She also told about how they pick a song to sing before bed and Manny picks the one he calls "So". She had me guess what song it was and it took a second to come up with "...the Bible tells me so". Oh, my heart! She knew that would get me because my boys sang that also, with Timmy's being sung in bass! Gabe likes the song "Zaccheus", about the wee little man up in the tree. "Zaccheus, you come down! I'm going to your house today!" At church Easter morning, Paul was telling me how my goddaughter, Sarah, walks around singing "Oh, Christ, Lamb of God" continually. The preschool and young Sunday schoolers sang it in the service a couple weeks ago, and she'd sing it every week if they let her. I told him that was evidence of what wonderful parents she has, if that's what their daughter is singing. Gabe, Manny, and Sarah---our little missionaries!

Lucas and Sarah watching "Jeopardy" while standing in the toy box!

Time to get ready to go to the beauty shop again, this time to get my silver removed and a trim, and then over to church for Visitor calls. Time is getting closer and closer for my trip to WI and I'm getting so 'cited!!!

The bug plague

Click on photo to enlarge

If you look closely, you can see the dead bodies lying on the floor in the corner of my room. It seems the blind mosquitoes are attracted to the light, as there are few to none in the unused rooms in my home. Mainly in my room and the bathroom. They are called 'no see 'em' because they are so minute they can fit through screening and teeny tiny. But oh my, what a nuisance! I can get a pile like this almost every day, and this is before sweeping them up!