A funk has fallen over us

Last week was expected to be a more, oh, let me see, "funky" week due it being the anniversary week of my son's death and his birthday/funeral service. Thanks to my thoughtful son and caring friends keeping things busy, something to do every day to avoid wallowing, it was a good week. Many people sent messages of remembrance and consolation, sharing their own memories of Timmy with me, or even mailed Justin and me a card. Always a lovely touch.

Today I attended a meeting at The Club, the monthly one of a politically-themed group I have joined. As part of the meeting, announcements were made and one lady stood to report that a man many of us knew had passed away on vacation the day before. When she said his name, I gasped and my hands went up to my face. Orien is on our trivia team and we'd just played on Wednesday night. The next day this group of four from our team were going to the British Virgin Islands on a boating trip. 

From initial reports and from what the newspaper from BVI tells us, Orien and his dear wife, Jacque, had jumped from a catamaran and were swimming to shore. When she got there, he was not with her...More details will be forthcoming but it's horrifying to think of what happened. He is in his late 70's and she just retired from a long nursing career. She and I share having lost children, hers a toddler, lost to a fast-moving illness (possibly meningitis). She is just a sweetheart and my heart hurts for her.

The four (or now three of them) have to remain in BVI for the rest of the week pending the outcome of the investigation and the release of O's body. Tonight at Happy Hour (I called it Sad Hour) there were only a few of us and Karrie had laid a fire in the formal dining room fireplace for us. The garden room is being used by the movie people. I was glad to be in this more intimate setting. O was on the Board of The Club so it is particularly hard-felt by those there. Hugh and Maureen did not come over (he is very good friends with O and the other man who is on the trip, had actually been notified by Arnie the day that it happened, from BVI, with the terrible news). 

Karrie says The Club will be standing by to serve the family in whatever way is needed. O was extremely involved in the community and county, my having met him 20+ years ago at the Chamber of Commerce, but actually got to know them here at The Club and at the pool. 

Justin had told me that he was doing some research to help Arnie with a tech situation at his home, to sync his head phones with the TV so he doesn't blast Janet out of the house. Justin also told me tonight that he had been asked by Jacque to work on something for her, but I expect that is a long way down the line for her now. 

I was talking with Kathy at Sad Hour tonight, saying I almost feel like something happened to Janet and Arnie, and then realized that something had, something horrible. What they witnessed and are experiencing on their once fun vacation...Last week when Janet was leaving after trivia, she came up to me and cupped my face in her hands, and rubbed noses with me, saying, "You are just so......" She didn't finish her sentence to me but I got the picture, and I feel the same way about her, and Arnie. Such sweet folks, trying to enjoy their later years, and now this. So, yes, a funk has fallen over us.

http://members.jacksonville.com/news/crime/2014-01-22/story/clay-county-advocate-dies-tuesday-caribbean-swimming-accident

Problems with my bedding

The other day I related the story of Justin's helping me with my bed flipping and such, telling me my mattress pad was waving a white surrender flag. I have a padded mattress cover over the top of my pillow-topped mattress (no wonder my back aches when sleeping on Mom's day bed!) My previous comforter set fit perfectly, with sufficient drop on each side and end to cover the mattress, and not expose the sheets. This one, however, falls short (ha ha) of the task. 

So, when Justin came in here last evening, I started to tell him there was a problem with my new comforter....He said, "Don't tell me about it!", thinking we were going to have to take the whole works apart again and repack it in the bag it came in. I assured him it was here to stay, but that I had to make up my mind which side of the bed I wanted to see covered up. Very thoughtfully, but comically, he said, "Well, you have all those gentlemen callers coming through here...." What??? 

He was mocking me because this would so not be an issue for a man, you know? But it would bother me (it already does!) to see my mattress exposed when I turn around in my desk chair, so I yanked the comforter to cover up the sheet/mattress on this side of the bed. No one sees it except me, and him, but this stuff matters to me! When a person buys sheets, the manufacturers take into account the thicker mattresses but this might be why the comforter set is less expensive than others. When you see the photo, it might look exactly like the previous one, but there are some slight differences, other than the drop, such as this new one has buttons stitched into it, and is more glossy a fabric. Otherwise, the pattern is very much the same.

On Friday night when Debbie, our upstairs neighbor, came to dinner, she brought me with potted plant of tulips. Since then the tulips have opened even more, seeming to like their place on the river room table. At first I had them in the kitchen but Justin suggested they might like the river room better. So, I have the brightly colored flowers to see by day, and the sun jar from Linda to see at night, from my room. I am delighted!

Lights-Camera-Action!

Yesterday we got a notice about a movie being filmed on The Club property, an independent filmmaker, intended for presentation next year at the Sundance Film Festival. The theme is something like a "Christmas Wedding Baby". I could see Christmas decorations in the windows of The Club, which is sort of funny since they just took everything down after New Year!

 This must be the 'bride' and a perhaps a ring bearer, walking around between takes.

Some of the equipment is being moved around for the next scene. Lots of people over there, just not in my shots.

This is shot straight ahead of my vantage point at The Palace, looking across the lawn at this giant tree, probably hundreds of years old.

I just rotated myself a bit to get this shot of the pool area, looking over at The Villas condos, cabana, and pump house. It doesn't look very inviting today, because it's a bit nippy out there, for FL, that is!

Got some more photos today!

A good friend of Linda's (and mine!), Angie, attended worship the day Linda retired so she could be present for the recognition event. She took the following photos of Linda and me plus others, and sent these to me today. The one above is Linda reading the speech I wrote for her, which is apparently moving Pastor Schaefer, behind her. This photo was taken by Pastor Hoppe and doesn't enlarge very nicely. Sorry about that! 

This photo Angie titled "Besties" and I love that! I found it cute that the photo of Pastor Otto peeks over my shoulder---is he a photobomber???

Linda's granddaughter, Cassidy, is trying to show me a confirmation photo which is presented in this display.  It might have been mine, but I can't be sure. Cassidy is one of the twin grands Linda and Tom have, with Madison being the other. 

 Here is Linda and my sister, Lynn, plus me (in case you didn't know) 

This shot shows Linda and me at the table, with Karen W., one of the teachers, behind us. She is a friend of my pastor's wife from college days. Small world!

A reprint from 4 years ago....

MONDAY, JANUARY 19, 2009

I have a new normal!

Bible study today was a bit tear-provoking, but for another reason other than it being Timmy's birthday/funeral day. We got to hear Pete sing on the Come Worship Christ video again! In a foreign tongue, German perhaps. Loved to hear him singing once more...

*

After Bible class six of us headed to our haunt of Longhorn for our repast. We all had something totally different than our usual, which really messed up Patti, the waitress who takes care of us weekly. I told her, "So much for using the pre-printed forms" she uses for us, jokingly. We are no longer predictable. Twila and I shared the prime rib sandwich, as I did with Chris on Saturday, perfect sized for us.

*

Kelly T. asked me if I was going to the cemetery after lunch and I told her I was going Michael's for supplies for the ladies' group brunch. She was attending a funeral at Jax Memory Gardens so when I got done at Michael's, I drove over there, hoping to catch her before she finished working on her sister's gravesite, changing out the floral arrangement. I did find her and she joined me at Timmy's site. We spent some time together there as I waved to the guys coming and going on their carts and in their trucks. Even the mortician stopped by to chat with me, as usual, and we talked after Kelly left for her funeral. Damon is always quite nice to me, and expressed, in front of Kelly, that he had never experienced a funeral service quite like Timmy's. Nothing ordinary about it, and Kelly said, "Kim doesn't do anything ordinary!", truly lightening the moment. Damon said it was the first one and only one that had "satellite" worship set up. Timmy's funeral brought the most people ever to Good Shepherd, not before or since has our church been filled to overflowing!

*

Damon asked how I was doing and asked about Justin and I told him our plans to have dinner as usual at "Taste Tomatoes" tonight. He made the comment that I had to go through a lot of stuff in a brief period of time and said he admired me. Great, Damon, give me a chance to explain how all this is possible----but he already knew how the Lord enabled me to survive and then to flourish under the adversity. Seeing these guys, "my boyfriends", at the cemetery, even the two who had to jump into the hole to lower the coffin, was a good thing to have happen today.

*

Wednesday, the 14th, when Justin and I were at the gravesite for lunch, he had leftover windshield fluid which he put into my car while we sat there. Mike, the head guy of the grounds, stopped to say 'hi' and see if all was okay with my car. I explained that Justin had extra fluid and was putting it in my car, and Mike exclaimed, "That's your boy??" 

He couldn't get over what a big boy Justin was, even though we've seen Mike out and about other places. I told Mike we only put a balloon out so as not to break the rules about decorations, and he said, "You can do anything you want", but it's when other people follow suit that it becomes a problem. Of this I am aware, and I won't press the issue, I am sort of over that. What my sister-in-law, Mona, referred to as "a new normal", which she said I can use if I want to! My new normal is to visit there less frequently, not pile all sorts of memorabilia on and around the marker, not make the cemetery a destination. Take the flowers by when they are available from the church altar and ease on to other things. Eh? A new normal!

*

I am listening to "In Christ Alone" on my computer and it is such a wonderful piece, peace.

Dinner with friends

Justin and I were the guests this evening of our friends Stephanie, Erica and Jean, Stephanie's mom, from Janesville, WI. Jean is going home at the end of the month so the ladies wanted to have us over before she was gone. Jean made a chicken and rice dish for us, candied carrots (wonderful!), dinner rolls, and homemade cranberry sauce. All was delicious and the company great.

We had to leave rather abruptly, however, as we were parked behind Erica and she had to go, too. Erica, besides being a student at UNF and her internship, is also a dog sitter so had to go and tend her charges. Justin had plans to meet his friends later on so it was time for us to head out. 

Justin and I needed a nice dinner out after the big job we faced earlier in the day. It was time to put on my new comforter set (thanks again, Mom!) which also meant time to flip the mattress and box spring. Oh, and while you're at it, the area under the bed must be vacuumed out. I don't know how in the world it gets so dusty under there, but it does. There I go with that dust talk again. 

He is a good sport about the whole thing, though he did criticize the condition of my mattress pad. The sides, where it wraps around the mattress, is starting to break apart ("waving a white flag", as he described it) but the top is in excellent condition. I can live with it! My sheets were washed, then dried, and reapplied, by me, alone.

                            

Glenn Beck and Marcus Luttrell

Justin would have helped me but had gone to see "Lone Survivor" with his friends. He said the movie was extremely good, but I didn't need to worry about not seeing it. He said that since I already know Marcus' story, I didn't need to expose myself to the filthy talk, "cussing", as Justin described it, or the horrors of war. Not sure how much of the movie would be left after the editing for TV was done, when that time comes! But I am a fan of Marcus and will stay that way. Justin said he held himself together well in the movie, until the very end, when the man in front of them stood up and snapped a salute. All three guys were so moved, all wiped their eyes a bit...

Some more photos

Last December had I some friends over to visit, before I left for WI. The next night this couple, Nancy M. and Bill, were going to her work's Christmas party which was going to be unusual. A painting party! My friend, Sonya, works for this place, called Painting with a Twist, and I found these photos on her page. Bill and Nancy have since determined that painting is not their thing!! But he was a good sport and went to the event under protest. He looks cute in his apron!

When I got back home from WI, Justin proudly showed me his Chia Willie I'd given him for Christmas. One thing he determined upon planting the seeds was that he was not to have used the entire amount. Ooops! Those infernal directions!! So, now that Willie grew out, he was beginning to get a bit moldy on top. If Justin had saved some of the seeds, he could have been replanted but alas, Willie will now mold away. I was thinking about this the other day---When Justin was younger, he'd always want to play Monopoly with his father, even though his father played real life monopoly (real estate!) all day long. So what do I get a landscaper but more grass to grow!!!

This is a photo from long ago, probably in the early 1990's, taken by Linda at her home in Manty. Justin has such cute pants on, certainly made by his grandma. I am sporting my large-framed glasses and have short hair. Aren't we cute??? Linda found this in her archives when searching for something else, and now it's mine! What a great Christmas present to get, in addition to my handmade cards.

                                               
This is a shot of the ice cream parlor portion of the candy store, Beerntsen's Candy Shop, in Manty. It is in a building where we used to be part-owners many years ago. It still has the charm of years' gone by, the way I remember it from when I was a kid, sitting in those wooden booths and listening to the juke box. The juke box is gone now, but most everything else seems the same. 

Mom and Lynn browsing in the candy portion of the shop, Beerntsen's, where the majority of the candies, mostly chocolates, are hand-made, hand-dipped. Mom was looking for something to get for our friend, Gretchen. What did I buy? Red licorice bits, of all things!