Sunday I have planned for Justin and I to decorate our rooms for Christmas. I am more excited about than is he, of course, as he hates to do the tree. I will be glad to do the tree, but I can't put it up myself (I tell him...) and cannot reach the top, etc. It is a two-person job. He doesn't like the pulling apart of the branches part of the decorating, so that will be my job. One good thing about our tree location is that it is not the center of attention in the room, but nicely set in a corner, offering ambient light and decor. I don't do much 'for a grade' any more, less performance pressure the last decade or so. Wow, it's almost a decade already!
Since I am talking about history here, I have more to add. This a.m. I had The Breakfast Club with some ladies, Ollovan and Pat. Pat used to be a volunteer fire fighter which is how she met her husband, David. They both served at the station which which responded to our emergency back in 2001, but neither of them were among the responders. I told her about the letter one of the EMTs had written to me after Mom, Justin, and I dropped off Honey Baked Hams at the two stations. Pat wondered if she knew the lady who wrote the letter, so I am making it my mission to locate that letter in my archives. Wow!
This has been an eye-reddening day, and an eye-opening mission for me to be on. Long and short, I did locate the letter and realize I must re-type it before it is no longer legible, as it has faded a great deal. It was hand-written on a paper with clouds on it, and the writing is hard to make out. I can staple it to the original but I want to make sure I can read it in another 10 years, if I need to. I gave Pat bad info, however, as the lady was at the other station and not hers, as I had originally 'remembered'.
As I read through many of the multiples of a hundred cards and notes from people, it saddened me to realize I didn't recall who some of these people were. Their notes were so touching and intimate, yet their name rang no bell for me. And I thought "I'd never, ever forget these people" and the events. I am sure this part of God's healing for us, to put these memories aside so we don't dwell, but I feel badly about not storing these names and faces in my heart and memory. One lady stuck in my mind as I struggled to remember who she was...and all of sudden, later, it came back to me that she was our neighbor on the street we lived on where Timmy was born.
There was a lovely poem which was not signed but I attributed to my niece at first. But that didn't ring true either as another card revealed a girl named Becky had written us a poem. Okay, so who is this Becky? Searching and searching my memory banks----ah, yes! She worked in Peggy's dental office and would often babysit for us. That was why she remembered tucking him into bed, reading stories to him and his curly hair and his laugh...
When Justin came home from work I sort of put the stuff to the side because he used to not like it when I did stuff like this. When I wrote a piece for my high school's alumni newsletter many years back, he asked me how long I would be yet in getting it done. At that time my office was just off the family room at our lake house and he could see/hear me at work. I sort of learned a lesson from that...which is why I likely put the 'book' aside as long as he was around.
Speaking of the book, after reading through the lovely notes people wrote to us upon Timmy's death and the weeks afterward, I am rethinking the format of the book. The messages in the book can tell the story for me, if I let them.
Linda touched base with me throughout the day as she vacationed in the winter wonderland of MN at our friend's home. She knew of my project and sent me encouragement and comfort as I went through the basket.
Tomorrow I have a seminar at my financial planner's office about Medicare. I know, I know, not old enough yet but it never hurts to get the scoop well in advance, plus have a lovely 'brunch' with the other folks. Plans are being made to lunch with my neighbor, Debbie, Saturday as well, depending upon how long the seminar lasts. I'd like to dine alfresco if possible and make the most of our sunshining days. In the low 80's again today---yay!
