Loss and the holidays

In the most recent edition of "Forward in Christ", a periodical published through our Synod, there was a story about a pastor and his wife who lost their 2 1/2 year old son on Christmas Eve due to a fast moving illness which consumed him. They had no worship that night, as you might expect, but the pastor did conduct the festival service on Christmas morning, to celebrate the birth of our Savior. Without this babe, he said, he could never have peace with the loss of his babe. I get that.

As I lie here and think about it, my friend, Linda, comes to mind. A couple years ago I was able to meet her good friend, Angie, and meet again Debbie and Chris, with whom Linda works out nearly every morning. We were lunching at the Harborside just before Christmas and having a marvelous time. Angie was telling me how Linda talked about Justin and me often, and she felt like she knew us already. I felt like I knew her as well.

Linda had reported what a sweetheart Justin is (of course!), and as we gushed over him, my phone went off. I excused myself to talk to Justin, calling from FL. When I came back from the chat with him, I told them what he had to say. Justin was cautioning me to NOT listen to the first hour of our favorite radio show that day because the guest host was talking about the unopened gifts under the Christmas trees of the homes of those slaughtered in CT at the school shooting. He is familiar with that sadness, that empty feeling, and knew it would upset his mother. So he called to warn me. The ladies were moved when I told them why he called. It was so thoughtful of him to be looking out for me this far away.

I had shared this experience with my sister, Lynn, then, and a few nights later, she presented her youngest grandson, Angelo, with a stuffed lion. This lion had been on her shelf for over a decade (oh my, that sounds like a long time!), intended for Timmy's birthday the year he died. Lynn took that unopened present and gave it to Angelo, to open. I just love that. Brings tears to my eyes yet today. Thinking now about all the parents out there who have unopened gifts intended for those no longer here. I am glad to have the opened gift, the comfort of knowing that my Redeemer lives and my loved one is with Him in eternal bliss. There are no tears where he is, only bliss beyond compare, where everyday is Easter and everyday is Christmas. "How my heart yearns within me..."

Preschool Christmas program

In recent years Betty, Judy, and I have been privileged to serve as hostesses for Precious Lambs Preschool's Christmas program. This year Judy had a schedule conflict and was not able to attend but did make some wonderful cookies. Betty and Michael got the room set up, we got the cookies displayed, and I made punch for the reception. My lady friends are more creative than am I but I am no slouch when it comes to making oatmeal Scotchies! 

These are the cookies made by Judy (on the tray) and Betty's on the foam block. Oreo's dipped in white chocolate and then decorated to look like snowmen. This idea was sent to her by me!

Here are the kids starting to assemble before the program. They had the jitters in their legs for sure, and the little blonde boy cried more than once before going over to church. He is not yet 3 so this is a big adjustment for him. They are taking kids a bit younger than usual to get the census up in the classroom. Hoping for more students in the New Year!

Good times with friends

I had such a nice visit with my friend, Edda, who came over for a couple hours. It was great to have a chance to catch up on news, her recent retirement and discuss the search for some ways to spend this new free time.This is what prompted her to seek me out--since she follows me on Facebook, Edda figured I would be a good resource. She asked me for suggestions or ideas for how to serve others in the community. I rattled off a few things some of my friends are involved in which might interest her and promised to send more information as I was able to garner it. I so enjoyed our time, especially since she asked me about my church. She is going to join Justin and me for worship on Wednesday night!

This a.m. Nancy W. had asked me to join her for breakfast at Grumpy's. She came by for me and together we rode over. She had recently been entertaining a friend from her past, a man she had dated over 40 years ago. They are both now alone, he being a widower, and is not a stranger to this area. He contacted her a couple months ago and came to visit, returning twice since then. She confided that she is 'very very much in like' with this guy, enjoying the company of a gentleman. When I told Justin about this, he was so glad because he knows Nancy needs some good stuff in her life. I agree but then I have to get in line to spend time with her. That's okay---I can wait!

I told Nancy about how I spent nearly two hours with my old friend, Martie, also at Grumpy's. We did a bit of reminiscing about the old days when we'd spend our time on the patio at Johnny Carino's and in my studio at the lake house and here. Life gets in the way for Martie and occupies her time so this works out for us to meet before she has to go to work. We can often just pick up where we left off in our conversations, sometimes the same ones we had those years back at Carino's. Sadly, that place is no more, so Grumpy's will do!

A friend from the past

In a few moments someone with whom I spent much time in the past is coming to see me. Etta retired, closing her business which was nearby to my home, and is now officially retired. Already today she has been to yoga class which means she is an up and at 'em girl. She lives not far from our shared friend, Brenda. I actually introduced the two ladies to each other before Brenda even came to work for us, and they became fast friends. Brenda had then worked for the developer of our community and Etta handled the closings. Worked out great for them, and then Brenda came to work for us, which was even better.

Besides our business dealings, I worked closely with Etta when we built her home many years ago. I can remember clearly persuading her to use a vibrant  paint color for her front door when everything else she chose was safely neutral. The color was named "Watermelon" and how strange that I remember this detail!! She was thankful later for me pushing her to stick her neck out that way. 

Etta and her daughter are such good friends to Brenda that at least once, sometimes twice, a year they take her along with them to the Bahamas. They used to have access to a beach property but now they just stay in a hotel or inn when they go. It is such a wonderful getaway for them all, and a special treat for Brenda. They are so good to her, and for her!  I used to send my discarded clothing along with Brenda for her to give to a lady they were friends with in the Bahamas. One year the lady sent back a lovely necklace and anklet for me. She made the jewelry and sold it to tourists who came to her display set up along the path. So primitive an existence, and yet so grateful for my donations. 

I am looking forward to playing some catch up with Etta, and since she expressed a desire to visit my church with me sometime, this might be the first of many regular conversations! More later!

"Do not fear"

This was the theme of our Ladies' Advent Service (or ABC, as our hostesses call it) at Victory. It is such an enjoyable evening at this service by women and for women, followed by sumptuous treats at beautifully decorated tables. The best part for me is getting see all the ladies again. One lady I got to see came via iPad, as her daughter-in-law, Jenna, made it possible for Marilyn to "attend" from her home. Marilyn has inoperable cancer of the heart and her days are spent in a hospital bed set up at home. Ordinarily she'd have been in the middle of this whole ABC event, but this time, only a spectator from the comfort of her home. 

Carol came by to pick me up and direct her to our destination. We drove in misting rain which was unpleasant but not horrible (at least, not for me as a passenger!). Laurie was supposed to join us but her husband had to work last night so those plans were changed. Only the three of us signed up to attend, which is sad because it's such a wonderful way to 'look forward' to Christmas. 

Esther, seated across from me in this photo, was our hostess. She told us how the first ABC held here had 35 in attendance and this year's reservations topped 90. It is just that popular an event, with their members inviting family members and friends to share this special time with them. 

Before Carol came for me, I watched the Jaguar game. At halftime I was hopeful the Jags would be able to pull off another victory but, alas, it was not to be. At least we'll get to watch the Packer game tomorrow night which will make up for our sad Jaguar game. It was great to spend the time in worship and fellowship with Carol and the others at Victory. Such a lovely evening...

"Are you a friendly neighbor?"

My friend, a Realtor, sends out a newsletter every month or so through her real estate business. I used to be paid to prepare these mailings for her so know all about them. This month's letter arrived and was lying on my bed when Justin came in. Seeing the letter, he laughed a bit when he read the title question.  "You???", he asked.  I told him I chuckled a bit when looking at it because I am sure my neighbors get quite annoyed with me...Not really, but I truly didn't need a reminder letter about it. How unfortunate, though, that some folks do need to be encouraged in such a fashion.

The suggestions were made to get to know your neighbors better for safety reasons in addition to just being the right thing to do. To make your neighborhood a smiling place to be. There are gift suggestions such as cocoa mix in a mug, a poinsettia, or baked goods taken to the door to introduce yourself. This brought to mind how a few years back each of the residents in my building received ceramic mugs with candy in them one morning before Christmas. No one knew who did it, and people were guessing it was me. They said this sounded like something I would do, and I was a bit ashamed of myself for not doing it! I don't think the gift giver ever came clean but it sure was a nice gesture. But, it didn't really help us to get to know each other better, by remaining anonymous. What it did, though, was put a smile on the receiver's faces and the gift giver's, as well.

So, there is something to being a friendly neighbor. I have certainly experienced such here in this building. I love my neighbors and go out of my way to let them know how much I appreciate them. They are at my door with chicken soup when I am recuperating from oral surgery (Ellen), or come running with mops and buckets when that particular need arises, and yes, even pay to have my drywall repaired/painted when needed from a leak. It is just surprising to me that people need reminding to be good neighbors, but I guess it does. I know of some people who have no idea who their neighbors are, only enough to wave at, if that. One person tells me about a neighbor who actually turns their back when waved at as she passes by. For no apparent reason, just turns his back. I would take that challenge on, but not my friend---she just keeps waving!   

Other ideas in this letter suggest being considerate of others and keep your place tidy. These are things you learned growing up, and should carry over into your work place and everyday living. I do try my best to not be noisy for my neighbor's sake and am friendly when they come and go in my presence. Just the other day I gave a pitch to a couple looking at one of the units for sale (heard they ended up buying), telling them how nice it was to live here, and so on. Oh, goody, I'm getting new neighbors!!

Lunch with Martie

After a long time of Martie and I not seeing each other, today was the day! For one reason or another we have not hung out together for ages. We did see each other at a wedding in late June and it was great to catch up there, though briefly. She is busy with grandchildren, great-grands, work, her husband, her brother...Life gets in the way of our fun!

We agreed to meet for lunch at Grumpy's which is close to her work. She didn't have to be in until 1:30 so we had two hours to talk and eat and talk some more. I think I got caught up on all her family's news. Her sweet 'little' grandson, whom we called Man Man, turned 15 today which is so hard to believe. I've known him since he was about 4 years old and to imagine him as a teenager is nearly impossible!

This picture was taken at Justin's 21st birthday party in 2009. There is Man Man (now known as Little Mark) behind me, eating meat on a stick. Usually he ate grape tomatoes but this time he switched it up!

Tonight Justin and I went to worship for Advent services. He worked today but not as long as he did yesterday which allowed for him to get a rest before church. We had toyed with getting our dinner from Panda Express like we did last year but then Justin suggested we swing by Ming Moon on way home to pick up what he was craving. I just had some crab meat rangoons for my dinner while he had beef and broccoli. Oh yum! Can't go wrong with Ming Moon on a full moon night!