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No longer on the river and, again, an empty nester. Back to living on Fleming Island and making some more friends!

Saturday, August 22, 2015

Mind and thought management

The news these days on a national level is nearly wall to wall coverage regarding the candidates. It is early in the game and yet things are quite heated already, primarily one particular candidate running on the GOP ticket. When he is speaking or giving an interview, I often think of the advice given by the leader of the Writer's Guild to which I belonged, "Use your words economically." (I am a slow study!) This is often good advice, and would be especially so for this particular candidate. He has some good things to say, but sort of undoes things with his 'stray statements' which make him look foolish. He already has foolish stuff in his way and he pours gas on that fire right along. Are we all guilty of this in a lesser proportion?

There is an episode of "The Big Bang Theory" where one of the genius's moms comes for a visit. Sheldon's mom is from TX (bear in mind that she is made to look extra foolish, 'simple' actually, as compared to the geniuses who have no use for religious faith) and comes out with comments that Leonard feels compelled to correct. Many of the statements were common usage at one time, from even when my mom was growing up, while others have faded from use, or are strongly discouraged. The one remark was about Indians (Raj is East Indian) having a drinking problem, and Leonard informed her that 'we don't say that, either'. She looked at him quizzically and said, "I don't know how you people can even carry on a conversation anymore..." 

She is right---it's not safe! Every word has to be weighed and measured to avoid insulting or causing an offense toward another person. Finally Leonard said he would make her a list of the expressions or words which are no longer acceptable, to which she replied, "That'd be mighty white of you!". I don't even know what that means and cannot say I use it. Such a statement isn't even necessary to say 'thank you'. An economy of words would limit Mrs. Cooper's responses to 'thank you', and keep it at that. Good advice again for us all so we don't step on someone else's toes. "But let your communications be, Yea, yea; Nay, nay: for whatsoever is more than these cometh of evil." Matthew 5:37 

But, on the other hand, people do not need to be so thin-skinned and delicate that every minor slight sends them into a tail-spin. We have not come very far from one sister looking at the other at the breakfast table and getting into trouble for it. It doesn't mean a thing and yet the rule is made to not look at each other anymore. What else can you do? No more looking at each other. This is not a reasonable thing but it's causing a ruckus at the table, on one person's part, anyway, to be looked at. Now just about all we say and do can be misconstrued by someone, and we might not even be aware of it. We don't want to deliberately hurt others but at the same time wish to avoid cutting our feet on eggshells. 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

my response to the PC people, is that they don't have a right to be offended by something I say innocently!

Linda J

Kim Lahaie Day said...

Hi Linda:

That was pretty much where Sheldon's mom was coming from, not realizing that in this polite society such expressions are not used. She would use them innocently and yet they were obviously not 'acceptable' any longer. When being told not to say something, she would look at Leonard as if to say, "What is the problem with you?!?" I guess that would be me, bristling from filthy language or cursing, I am more PC than others!! We are good about trampling other people's rights or having ours trampled.