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No longer on the river and, again, an empty nester. Back to living on Fleming Island and making some more friends!

Monday, January 19, 2009

Warning: Timmy's birthday

Before the sun came up, Lynx was pawing at my bedroom door to get out, seemingly could not muster the strength to pull it open herself. Reluctantly I threw off my covers to free her and got back under quickly. The TV station which had lulled me to sleep was not showing the normal fare for early morning, but instead had a movie on about a bait shop. Ugh! Where was "Becker" this morning??? He was the predecessor of "House", the original arrogant, cranky doctor. For a while I watched/listened to the Real Estate Channel to find out what is on the market these days but they were showing areas not close to mine so I switched to a home make-over show instead. There will not be much news watching these days because it is not good for my spirit.
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While watching the TLC program, a commercial came on for what seems to be an upscale Golden Corral, featuring bacon-wrapped steaks, pork, and chicken. Nice! Being that today would be Timmy's 13th birthday and marks the anniversary of his funeral, my thoughts automatically went that direction. When we lived in Waterford Landing, his father and I bought a used piano from a family in Eagle Harbor, and the men on our staff had the dubious pleasure of picking it up and delivering it to our house. Justin was the only one taking lessons at first but when Timmy was 4 1/2, he was getting lessons, as well. Oh, it was a nightmare taking him to lessons, mainly because I had to sit in the room with his teacher, Tatiana, and him. She was Russian with a strong accent and I could barely understand her, much less a headstrong child. It would be like Lucas running all over the field to grab the ground balls, even if they were not his for the picking...that is how Timmy wanted to play the piano. She would say, in her Russian accent, "Play black set keys, play black set keys" and he would hit whatever keys he wanted, all the while kicking against the piano as his feet hung down from the bench. The song he did learn to play, using the black set keys, was a scale to which he would sing, "Mommy, I love you" as he worked from left to right. My favorite song!
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When my then spouse and I took a reconciliation cruise in 2000 to the Mediterranean, we paid one of our employees to watch the kids after school and get them off in the mornings, etc. She also had to take them to piano lessons, and when we got back, Tatiana had fired Timmy, telling the babysitter, "You don't bring him here no more!" Of course, it was not her place to fire him, and the owner of the studio said he could come back. Tatiana went on a sabbatical or something and a different person took over trying to teach Timmy to play piano. It was grueling, absolutely grueling to sit in there, with me pinching and threatening all the while the teacher tried to get him to play. He had already announced to Tatiana, "I play it the way I want it!" Okay then! I had wanted his father to please take a turn going to piano lessons just to see how awful it was, but Timmy died before that ever happened. The studio refunded the money we had paid in advance for his music lessons, as Justin's teacher left for maternity reasons and we just never went back for more lessons. Neither boy was crazy about learning to play and after a point, I didn't care either.
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How does Golden Corral figure in here? Immediately across the street from Suzuki Music was what Timmy called "Golden Ral". Nearly every week when Justin, Timmy, and I would come out of music class, Timmy would say the immortal words, "I got it! Let's go to Golden Ral for supper! How's that sound?" Years before it was cool, my hair was standing up from the stress of his piano lessons and it was not even 5:00 yet, too early for supper.....Once in awhile we would do it but not as often as Timmy thought we should eat at Golden Ral. I was the only one bearing any ill-effects from the piano lesson, and Justin a little bit, too. I never had to pinch or threaten Justin in his lessons but his brother, yikes!
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Rarely do we go to eat at Golden Corral, the last times being with the Rosses when their kids' schools have a sponsored function or something. Buffets are not really cost effective for me, believe it or not, since I am usually good for one trip up and that's it. For a big working man or hungry teenager it works out better, but not so much for me. Today Justin and I will be going to Sweet Tomatoes, or as he called it "Taste Tomatoes", Timmy's other favorite place, on his birthday. It is a salad bar and soup buffet with the added bonus of pasta dishes, and his favorite, the chocolate brownie with ice cream and sprinkles.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Enjoy your day, Kim. Your son, Justin, sounds like he has been a rock for you. You raised a great guy!

Kim Lahaie Day said...

Hi Jami!

Thanks for your observation about Justin! He is a good guy, and has rock-like characteristics. He is also sensitivie in his own right which also makes me very happy!

Blessings,

Kim

Suzanne Chappell said...

Happy Birthday, Timmy! Until we meet again!

I remember Timmy every morning as I fix Daniel his waffles, sometimes pancakes, with syrup for breakfast! He loves them too! How sweet the smell of syrup covered little boy is! *Hug!* (Little girls smell nice in syrup too, they just don't seem to wear as much!)


Love you, Kim and Justin too!

Suzanne

Kim Lahaie Day said...

Hi Suzanne,

I missed you! The smell of syrup, I wonder if you would appreciate it as much if Timmy hadn't worn it first.....just a thought.

I watched the video of the funeral tonight and saw John but not a glimpse of you. Perhaps you were standing in the back or were in the other room....

Thanks for your expression of love and concern for us, it is greatly appreciated!

Love you too,

Kim

Suzanne Chappell said...

You probably didn't see me because I was sitting in the back row, on the left side.

Most likely if I didn't know Timmy and his syrup smell, I wouldn't give it a second thought about Daniel. He reminds me so much of Timmy, sometimes it's amazing. Daniel doesn't have dimples like Timmy did in his cheeks (the unending dimples!), but he has a slight chin dimple like his mom, and little one on his nose when he laughs.

It's little reminders now and then, that keep Timmy's memory alive for me!

Have a great day!

Suzanne

Kim Lahaie Day said...

Hi Suzanne,

Do you know how cool it is for me to know that you remember where you sat at the funeral?????

If you hadn't mentioned the syrup-smelling hugs to me, would I have given it a second thought...........

Such good things to ponder these days...

Any word on your laptop? I know you have to send it off but was hopefull you resurrected it or something.

Blessings on your day,

Kim

Suzanne Chappell said...

I remember so much about that week in detail! I remember wiping the dining room table off, because it was covered with icing from Caitlyn's first birthday cake, and the phone rang. It was Chris Douglas telling me what had happened, and that you were all at the hospital. I remember him asking me to make calls to other families, asking them to pray for a miracle, and I remember Chris calling me again and telling me Timmy had died, and then having to share this news with the same families again.

I remember sitting in the church with Mark Vance, alone staring at our stained glass picture of Jesus for hours, and wondering WHY babies die, and what was the purpose, but mostly I remember saying... "You made it Timmy! You get to see Jesus before me! See you when I get there!"

I remember seeing you at the funeral home, wondering how in the world you were functioning, and thinking you had amazing strength! I remember that you had just had surgery to fix your hernia, and that you had had your eye surgery just before that as well! I remember sitting with my friends on the left side in the back row of our church, and that it was so full we didn't have enough chairs, and people were standing outside the doors! I remember seeing so many grown men, big burly contruction workers in tears! And I remember the funeral procession to Jax Memory Gardens, and thinking this was probably the longest ever seen on Blanding, and what a traffic jam! I remember standing at the cemetary seeing his little white casket, and thinking how small it seemed, and the flowers from the wreath beside it that went on top of it! I remember sending a card to you as well as one to Justin, and telling Justin I was praying for him, because I hoped that he wouldn't be forgotten in the sorrow, that it wasn't just the parents that lost a son, but he lost his little brother!

Kim, I remember so much about that week! I'm telling you all this, and I hope it doesn't upset you! I tell you this because I love you so much, and that little boy was a bookmark in my life! A bookmark in my faith, and I want you to know Timothy made a difference in my life!

Suzanne

Kim Lahaie Day said...

Dear, dear Suzanne:

Wow, I don't know what to say, except for many thanks for sharing your remembrances. What you have told me is helpful in ways you can never know, and will also aid in putting my thoughts together when I get around to finishing Timmy's book!

The minute details about THAT night are stuck in your mind, wiping the table, Chris calling you, sitting in church with Mark (was this on Wednesday??), and recognizing, as a good Sunday school teacher, that he was free, with Jesus.....................