A tragic loss of life

If you recall, I wrote the other night about my nephew, Tommy, taking his own life in late January. He just turned 34 at the end of October, much too young to die. His mom died of cancer on CHRISTmas Eve 2002 and he pretty much lost touch with his family since then. I had his e-mail address and would write every now and again just to check in. When his grandma died in August of 2007 he had not checked his e-mail for a while and totally missed getting the message. From that time on he gave me his cell phone number and he already had mine, so we could keep in touch.

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He did that during the summer when he called me to get a recipe. Yes, you read that correctly---he wanted a recipe from me!!!! He was hungry for a family favorite called "Hamburger Corn Pone Pie" and amazingly so, I laid my hands on it immediately for him. He filled me in, joyously, on the new lady in his life and her children. Tommy had big plans for putting in landscaping around their shared home, and I was looking up the plants he was talking about as we spoke, so I did not sound toooooo uniformed. He was just like his mother, talking endlessly about little of substance for over an hour. I did manage to throw a caution about jumping into anything, etc. with his "fiance" but did encourage him as far as settling down and such. He seemed to be on top of the world, at that time.

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On CHRISTmas Day he sent me a late night text message wishing me a Merry CHRISTmas and told me how much he liked the new bench grinder his fiance, Jeanna, had given him. Around ThanksLiving or so, Tommy asked me to text him my mailing address so he could send a CHRISTmas card so I got his address too, while I was at it. I shared it with Mona in case Arno wished to send a card for CHRISTmas, but I don't know if that happened or not.

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Judy and Tommy Connors from many years ago..........

Justin got the mailing address for Tommy's father who lives in the Detroit area so I can mail him a card. But, what do I say in it?? I can offer sympathy to EJ but he barely knew his son anymore. When last I spoke with EJ, he did not offer any acknowledgement that he was a believer in His Savior, and in fact, had objected to Judy attending worship when they were still married. Judy and EJ were divorced awhile before Judy got sick. What a mess!

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Family has been good about keeping me up to speed on the funeral arrangements and such, plus Justin has an "inside line" to what is going on. Justin indicated that Judy's ashes are going to be buried with Tommy's, which is appropriate. He had kept her ashes with him and had told me he was coming to see me, to spread his mom's ashes in the ocean, which is what she wanted done with them. Tommy never came.